L'Enfant Seul

A tiny toddler, I was wondering along a dark alleyway,
Scampering down the cobbled path.
My soft feet were being mutilated, walking was struggle.
Every step seemed to kill me,
Yet, I could not stop....
Being compelled to move ahead by a driving force,
Invisible, inaudible, but perceived only in the heart.
I was scared, I wanted to cry
But my eyes had dried;
The pain had soaked all of it,
Blank eyes can not have tears….
The alleyway was never ending,
Without even the faintest sign of life, let alone humanity.
It was only me, alone in that dimension.
How could there be a place so devoid of hope?
I must be dreaming, I thought.
But the times I touched the rough ground, or the cold walls,
I was thrown back into realization,
That it was, in fact, a harsh reality.
I broke into a run, my feet started bleeding....
I tumbled down and crashed on the stones.
But I was not hurt!
Along with my emotions, which were already dead,
Were my feelings deserting me as well?
I got up, and crawled further on,
Drawing strength from I know not what.
Who or what was it, ahead of me?
An apparition? An angel? Or Devil himself?
Could not be God…he seems to have forsaken me long back….
I pulled myself up and continued my journey
Along the dark damp and dank alley.
Any child would have frozen to death,
But even Death was eluding me.
How could it be? I was shocked.
I stood, facing myself!
Was it an illusion, or was it a mirror?
But I could feel him, a cold wave emanating from the phantom….
What did I want from myself? Sounds horrific, I knew.
I kept on staring at myself.
And the body ogled back, with mute, insensitive and lifeless eyes.
And then, all of a sudden, it all returned.
The excruciating pain, agonizing suffering and
Unbearable anguish, they were all back.
I could bear it no more.
I dropped down.
At last, it was curtains to my agony.
It is true, that I could not win,
But finally, Life was defeated….