The Boulevard of Broken Dreams

I shrieked in pain, as I felt something sharp cut my bare feet.
I was walking along the meandering path, full of curves,
But there were no crossroads.
The way ahead of me was as uninteresting as it could ever be
There were no choices to make;
The path was guiding me towards my destination.
I did not know where I was going or the reason why.
I had been hiking for hours, yet not a creature in sight
The grey sky made the surroundings gloomy.
I bent down to check what it was, what had hurt me.

It was like a piece of glass with jagged edges,
But it appeared that I held solid mist, silvery, glistening
Something smoky swirling between my fingers, as if I was clasping nothing!
Ahead of me, I saw several such pieces
Various shapes and sizes, but all with the same appearance.
It seemed someone had shattered a pane made of mist!
Around me, some figures were materializing,
Some human forms, but crouched like beasts.
Their gazes were blank, apparels shabby,
Was this place the infamous Necropolis I had read about in the myths?
I cried out to them, none did respond,
The hushed silence of the surrounding was choking me now.
In a scared bewilderment, I turned to run.
A hand from behind firmly gripped my shoulder;
The phantom had a pale face, and mute insensate eyes
With his other hand, he picked up a piece, and held it out to me.
No sound came out while he spoke, the lips barely moved
But somehow I could comprehend every word he said.
“You can not return from here, my friend.
See all these beings? They were once human too, just like you.
But now, here they are, devoid of all hope and happiness.
People lose everything and come here,
And there is no escape from this place.”
And then, confirming my darkest apprehension, he mumbled,
“You stand, on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams….”

Childhood’s End….

I was staring at the emptiness.
This is the room which once chimed with the noise of students,
Vibrant with their presence.
But now the seats are all vacant…
Was it but yesterday,
When the juniors bade us farewell?
I can’t remember the day since I have been in this school, my second home
This classroom, indeed my next den,
My friends, we were as good as a family.
Now, all of us will be scattered,
Taking up different careers, choosing to reside
In different corners of this vast world.
Busy we shall all be in our own professions,
No times to waste, in this competitive world,
No urge from within to laugh at those silly jokes,
Ideas for playing naughty pranks, not striking anymore.
Yes, those were days!
Answering the teacher correctly, and feeling proud,
Soaring high above in the clouds, when
The impressed gazes of my classmates caressed me,
And secretly stealing a glance, to see if she was looking!
That bonding of friendship,
One standing up for the other,
Fighting shoulder to shoulder, studying together, and playing as a team.
When again in life will I get all this?
Or will I, at all?
Going in yet another flashback,
I can distinctly see that lovely face,
Her long hair, those beautiful eyes,
My love, I shall remember you all my life.
In distant future, someday I will be reflective
And cherish all these magnificent moments,
Those crushes, the naughtiness, and of course,
The affectionate teachers, who like their own children, groomed us.
Now, it is time for a change,
For me to move on,
Step into another dimension of life.
There await me new ties, fresh relations,
Moments which will be as special, perhaps more.
Responsibilities to shoulder, new commitments to make,
It is the beginning of my journey,
As I prepare to face the real world.
The road that lies ahead of me is much broader now,
Leading to promises of prosperity.
But unfortunately, this path is so very crowded.
Oh yes! I stand at childhood’s end….

L'Enfant Seul

A tiny toddler, I was wondering along a dark alleyway,
Scampering down the cobbled path.
My soft feet were being mutilated, walking was struggle.
Every step seemed to kill me,
Yet, I could not stop....
Being compelled to move ahead by a driving force,
Invisible, inaudible, but perceived only in the heart.
I was scared, I wanted to cry
But my eyes had dried;
The pain had soaked all of it,
Blank eyes can not have tears….
The alleyway was never ending,
Without even the faintest sign of life, let alone humanity.
It was only me, alone in that dimension.
How could there be a place so devoid of hope?
I must be dreaming, I thought.
But the times I touched the rough ground, or the cold walls,
I was thrown back into realization,
That it was, in fact, a harsh reality.
I broke into a run, my feet started bleeding....
I tumbled down and crashed on the stones.
But I was not hurt!
Along with my emotions, which were already dead,
Were my feelings deserting me as well?
I got up, and crawled further on,
Drawing strength from I know not what.
Who or what was it, ahead of me?
An apparition? An angel? Or Devil himself?
Could not be God…he seems to have forsaken me long back….
I pulled myself up and continued my journey
Along the dark damp and dank alley.
Any child would have frozen to death,
But even Death was eluding me.
How could it be? I was shocked.
I stood, facing myself!
Was it an illusion, or was it a mirror?
But I could feel him, a cold wave emanating from the phantom….
What did I want from myself? Sounds horrific, I knew.
I kept on staring at myself.
And the body ogled back, with mute, insensitive and lifeless eyes.
And then, all of a sudden, it all returned.
The excruciating pain, agonizing suffering and
Unbearable anguish, they were all back.
I could bear it no more.
I dropped down.
At last, it was curtains to my agony.
It is true, that I could not win,
But finally, Life was defeated….

Love!!!

They call it some moments of bliss,
They say that these are times,
When one little heart beats for the other,
When the pair of eyes search for someone special.

This is a feeling of togetherness,
Even when you are miles away,
A feeling of warmth, no matter how depressed you are,
A source of strength to counter all difficulty.

This is a strong bonding,
And a promise to be there forever.
To some it may be sharing and caring,
Some name it as affection and concern.

To you it may be candlelight dinner,
While you take her hand in your own,
Or a deep timeless glance in each other’s eyes,
A swift kiss to make her feel home.

It is the time when two individuals,
Can silently wipe each other’s tears,
And the gorgeous smile of that exquisite Lady,
It is more precious to you than sapphire.

It is like heaven, it is paradise,
It is like crossing the Garden of Eden
When your fiancée walks beside you,
Although you are but on earth, on a narrow dusty road.

Dreaming of that special person in broad daylight,
It often happens to you,
You walk down in torrential rain with her,
And yet, the raindrops seem to caress you.

You look up at the moon on a silent full-moon light,
And there she is, her lovely face,
Prettier and graceful than the stars shining so bright.

People provide such wonderful names
To this divine feeling;
This heavenly relationship is described by them,
By eloquent earthly words.

I am but a common boy – devoid of all such high philosophies.
I call it by a single term – a word that says it all.
They might say it does not have the grandeur or style,

Yet, I simply chose to call it … LOVE!!!

Love @ First Sight!!

I was walking down the road,
When I first saw her.
She was in the garden, I passed it everyday;
How could have I missed her? My heart chided me.
It was love at first sight; I knew she was meant for me.
It was a wintry morning,
But my feelings for her spread warmth within me.
I went closer, and to my joy,
She did not shy away.
I picked her up, no protest came,
So I planted on her a kiss.
She radiated a reddish hue, she of course felt embarrassed.
Her lovely curls, I became mad at them,
They seemed to be divine.
Her touch was soft, so was she,
And she looked gorgeous in her long green dress.
Her fragrance filled the air around.
I was feeling very special;
After all, it was me,
The guy she had chosen for herself.
I spent an instance to make up my mind,
That I was taking her home,
To ensure she was mine and mine alone.
Thus, keeping her close to my heart,
I retraced my steps.
I presume you are wondering, what kind of a boy am I!
Naughty minds, what did you think?
I meant the Morning Rose!!

SINJINI

“The person who was responsible for my state is responsible for my death”, the suicide note read.

The air of the house was filled with sorrow. Mrs. Roy, Sinjini’s mother was crying her heart out. It seemed that the feeling of Sinjini’s grandmother had frozen. The poor old lady was sitting still in her room. Mr. Sanjib Roy had lost all power to console his family. Little Raj never knew what to do!

Not only the family, but the neighbors too were shocked at the drastic step this little girl of sixteen had taken. No one could understand why Sinjini had decided to end her life.
To know why Sinjini had committed suicide, we have to go back two months in time. Sinjini was in her “sweet sixteen”. One day, Sinjini saw from her balcony that a new family had moved in the house opposite to theirs. A boy of eighteen and his parents – this made the family.

The heroine of our story, Sinjini, was a very jolly, fun-loving and happy-go-lucky girl. Though only sixteen, she had a personality which surprised people. However, her friendly nature made everybody around feel at home. She was very popular among the children of the neighborhood. Any celebration or function without Sinjini? No one could possibly think of it! What made her most popular was her smile. Hardly ever did she put up a long face.
However, Sinjini had a problem. People may argue that what she thought could never be a drawback on her part, but unfortunately, I can not agree. Sinjini hated the idea of falling in love. In fact, she disliked most boys. It was her staunch belief that falling in love was the stupidest thing one could ever do. Sinjini, being a daring and straight forward girl, openly expressed her principal.

“Man proposes, God disposes.” In this case it was a proposal of a young girl. Whenever Sinjini proclaimed her hatred for love, the person up there smiled. “It is still not time, child. When time is ripe, you shall know what love is!!” He perhaps mused.

One day, in the month of August, it really did happen. It was monsoon, not of course the most romantic of the seasons. Sinjini saw a boy walking down towards their house. Her eyes followed the boy who entered the house opposite theirs. The Cupid’s arrow struck! Someone who never believed in love fell headlong into it. Sinjini did all she could to find out about the boy. To her joy, she discovered that the guy was Rajeev, who had moved in the house opposite.

It is said, “Someone can not hide if he or she is in love.” It was surprising that a girl with such personality succumbed to it. Everybody around was a bit surprised at her change. However people accepted it, thinking that after all she was growing up! But if only they knew that the change would bring about a disaster like the death of Sinjini in the long run, they surely would have paid more attention.

Sinjini could have continued loving Rajeev secretly for a long time, but her nature urged her to confess about it to him directly. On the other hand, her personality, whatever it remained that is, stopped her. However, love got the better of logic, and one fine day, she picked up courage and approached him.

I do not find the conversation between a boy and a girl who have met for the first time and when one of them is proposing to the other, apt to be penned down. I feel, they should be allowed some privacy. Anyway, to be frank and truthful, even I do not know exactly what words were exchanged. I sort of believe it to be unethical to eavesdrop into the private conversation between a boy and a girl!

Rajeev requested for some time. Sinjini had to agree. But what satisfied her that there was a chance he would say yes. I was sure he would accept Sinjini. Any boy would be more than glad to have Sinjini in his life. She was indeed too good a girl.

Unfortunately, that never actually happened. I do not know why, but Rajeev refused her. I still remember the date, 7th August. It was Friendship Day. I had gone to meet Sinjini. I found her in her room crying her heart out. For her, nowadays, love meant a lot. She simply could not bear the thought that some one had said no to her. I tried to console her, but words failed me. I returned home with a heavy heart.

After that day, she changed completely. She had broken down. Her jolly nature was lost. Her friends tried to stand by her, but she requested them to leave her alone. After that there was little they could do. Exactly fifty-six days later, everyone was shocked by this tragedy.

None of the neighbors knew the story behind. Only I did. Different kinds of comments were being passed. Some clearly hinted that may be Sinjini was not that good a girl. Standing near Sinjini’s body, I had felt a burning sensation in my head. I strongly wished I had strength enough to silence all those voices forever....

Those people had no right to say a word against my Sinjini...yes, my Sinjini. I love her. Now that she is no more, she can not be anyone else’s. She will be mine and mine alone. I could never make myself profess my feelings for her. I knew she hated the idea of love. I had always been a special friend to her. I could never afford to her or her friendship. But now I wish I had told her how much I love her. May be feelings for me would have developed in her heart. There was a possibility that she would snap all ties with me, but if only I had taken a chance, may be Sinjini would never have left us all. Yes, I had been selfish!

Her suicide note lay in front of me. I could read every word of it. I desperately wanted to figure out who ‘the person’ was. I blame myself largely for what had happened. I should have taken a chance. Rajeev too could be ‘the person’. But was he totally at fault? My heart does not agree. Though, sometimes I have a burning desire to punish Rajeev yet, my logic has to admit, he can not be blamed. Sinjini – was she herself responsible for her own death? My love for her prevents me from blaming her. Perhaps she could not have done anything better! She had grown too emotional after having fallen in love. It seemed all the emotions past sixteen years had flooded into her heart in merely a month or two. Well, I will never say what she did was wrong. I can not. She had loved, and love knows no logic, no limitations. It leaves me with only one contender, a feeling rather that a person. Love! Love, thou art incomprehendable. You do miracles. You make and you break. I have not strength enough to fight you. But I kneel down before you, and urge, please do not let miseries touch true lovers. Allow them to be united. And if you can not, then at least give permission to logic to remain in human heart alongside you!

Did I not hear the sound of a jeep and an ambulance? The police have arrived to remove the body.